Drew.

It's funny how things can hit you. I had this kindergarten teacher (I know, everyone has one of those, pretty much, but...still). I loved her. Man, she was just the best thing ever to me back then. I remember being so excited to go to school and see her and pound nails into stumps of trees and swing in hammocks and learn my letters and kindergarten was DEFINITELY the last year of school I liked math.

Anyway, I loved kindergarten, and I loved Mrs. Pearson. I went to a small private school, similar to the one my kids go to now, and so everyone knew everyone else, pretty much. The same year I was in her class, her son was in her class, too. I remember thinking how awesome it was to get your mom as a teacher...I was totally jealous of Drew.

In first grade, Drew was overjoyed when his name showed up on our spelling test (as the past tense of draw, not his actualy name), and in second grade, he came over to my house and played with my baby cousin and I remember thinking how cool it was that he liked babies (Yes, at the ripe old age of seven, apparently babies were already on my mind.

My aunt LOVED Drew. She was convinced I would grow up and marry him for no good reason except that he was cute, and she tried to get me to have a crush on him. A lot.

We never dated...in fact, I lost touch with him before I was old enough to have a real crush on anyone. But I always remembered him, and his mom, in the way that your first real memories seem so vivid and near. To me, as I picture him, I see that second grader hanging out at my house after school.

Drew grew up, and he got married, and strangely enough, he moved about two hours away from me, which is sort of a big deal, since I moved across the country from our hometown. I never knew he moved, never knew him or his wife as adults. I never knew they were expecting, never knew that were expecting a daughter named Peyton.

Drew was driving home after his daughter was born the other day, and he got into a car accident and was killed.

Sorry, after all the build up, I didn't know how to actually write it. I am so sad today it hurts. He was such a good man, by all accounts, and all I can picture is that sweet boy he was. He was building a family, building a life,  and in a split second, it all disappeared. I am aching for his wife, and his parents, and his daughter.

It's a tragic story, and it almost seems like it can't be true. I feel guilty feeling so terrible, because I only knew him as a kid, and it was a long time ago. But he was so young. 27. Since high school, I have seem my friends get married, have kids, even get divorced. But no had died...until now. It's just sad, all around.

I went to the bookstore, because I was kind of freaking myself out, and it seemed so silly...to be ordering hot chocolate, and looking at books, like life was normal, when Drew is gone. But that's silly, because he hasn't even crossed my mind in years. But somehow, today, that doesn't matter.

To the Pearsons, I am so, so sorry for your loss. Thank God for your faith, and that baby girl.